How Guys Turn Down Girls

SHE : I'm a photographer I've been looking for a face like yours!
HE: I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours!!

SHE : May I have the pleasure of this dance?
HE: No, I'd like to have some pleasure too!!!

SHE: How did you get to be so beautiful?
HE: I must have been given your share!!!

SHE: Will you come out with me this Saturday?
HE: Sorry! I'm having a headache this weekend!!!

SHE: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out!
HE: Okay, get out!!!

SHE: I think I could make you very happy
HE: Why? Are you leaving?

SHE: What would you say if I asked u to marry me?
HE: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time!!!

SHE: Can I have your name?
HE: Why, don't you already have one?

SHE: Shall we go and see a film?
HE: I've already seen it!!!

SHE: Do you think it was fate that brought us together?
HE: Nah, it was plain bad luck!!!

SHE: Where have you been all my life?
HE: Hiding from you.

SHE: Haven't I seen you some place before?
HE: Yes, thats why I don't go there anymore.

SHE: Is this seat empty?
HE: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down .

SHE: So, what do you do for a living?
HE: I'm a female impersonator.

SHE: Hey baby, what's your sign?
HE: Do not enter.

Cat on the Roof

A man left his cat with his brother while he went on vacation for a week. When he came back, he called his brother to see when he could pick the cat up. The brother hesitated, then said, "I'm so sorry, but while you were away, the cat died." The man was very upset and yelled, "You know, you could have broken the news to me better than that. When I called today, you could have said he was on the roof and wouldn't come down. Then when I called the next day, you could have said that he had fallen off and the vet was working on patching him up. Then when I called the third day, you could have said he had passed away." The brother thought about it and apologized. "So how's Mom?" asked the man. "She's on the roof and won't come down."

Call for Annie Wan

Caller: Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan ? Operator: Yes, you can speak to me. Caller: No, I want to speak to Annie Wan! Operator: Yes I understand you want to speak to anyone. You can speak to me. Who is this? Caller: I'm Sam Wan. And I need to talk to Annie Wan! It's urgent. Operator: I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about? Caller: Well… just tell my sister Annie Wan that our brother Noe Wan was involved in an accident. Noe Wan got injured and now Noe Wan is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan is on his way to the hospital. Operator: Look, if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for this! Caller: You are so rude! Who are you? Operator: I'm Saw Ree. Caller: Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name! Operator: That's what I said. I'm Saw Ree… Caller: Oh… God!!

The Rabbit and the Butcher

A rabbit hops into a butchers' shop and says "have you got any cabbages?" The butcher says that he doesn't sell cabbages and the rabbit hops off. The next day the same rabbit hops into the same butchers and says, "have you got any cabbages?" The butcher, getting annoyed, says "look I told you yesterday - I'm a butcher, I don't sell cabbages, now go away!" The rabbit hops off. But the next day it hops into the butchers again and again asks "have you got any cabbages?" The butcher, really annoyed now, snaps "No I haven't got any damn cabbages! If you come in here again asking for cabbages I'm will nail your ears to the floor!" The rabbit is scared by this and quickly hops out the door. The next day it hops into the butchers and asks "have you got any nails?" The butcher replies angrily, "NO" "Okay," says the rabbit with a grin, "what about cabbages?"

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